Current mood:

depressed

Aye...
I'm really tired...

Well, something's gone terribly wrong. You guys really don't know anything about this, because it's a secretive sort of thing. But Chelsea and Caitlynn had been dating, and keeping it hidden from Cait's mom because her mom his horribly against it. She found out. This was actually a week or two ago, but some recoils have hit. So now Cait's thinking it would be better to just end it, and stop the pain, but Chelsea doesn't want to. They got into a big fight and "broke up" (altho I'm not so sure this is going to really be the end), and both called me and I had to listen to them cry for two hours each. Now this isn't really a complaint, because I'd much rather them call me and let this all vent instead of bottling it up, but damn, it hurts to hear your two best and longest friend's crying and you can't do anything about it...

I know how hard it is for them, but it's hard on me too. I feel like I should be able to give them all the answers, but I can hardly answer a fraction of them... I get worried because Chelsea has some self-destructive tendencies, and Cait means so much to her, and if she feels that Cait never had true feelings for her (which she did think so, but I know that's not true), then she may try to really put an end to the pain. She doesn't have anywhere to go, really, because her family is steadily falling apart, and if her first true love suddenly gives up on them... She only seems to have me, if Cait leaves, and I'm worried I won't be enough to keep her here... Then I'd not only be left with the shock and gilt of her gone, but Cait would go into a fit blaming herself, and probably end up either killing herself or damn close to it.

God, I knew it was going to be hard when they first told me what was going on, but we all had that fairytale belief that "true love will prevail over all odds". And now the water's stacked up against them and pounding them into the ground, and all I can do is watch from the bridge, telling them "everything will be alright"...